Hello, universe

Written by on May 7, 2012 in 30 Life Crisis, Americas, Blog, Nevada, Utah - 40 Comments

“Mom!!” I scream into my phone as I drive away from Red Mountain Resort under the sinking Utah sun. “Something has happened!”

“Are you OK? What is it? Where are you?”

Entirely breathless, I launch into the past two days at Red Mountain. The desperation. The reiki. The shamanic healing.

“And now … something is different. I can’t even begin to explain it,” I marvel in utter disbelief on the quick change my life has suddenly made.

It’s only been 20 minutes, but I’m high. There is no sad in me anymore.

The sadness, the pain, the hatred, which reared its ugly head and began to drag me down, down, down, has disappeared.

My heart is racing. My shoulders are relaxed. There is this sense of peace I have never felt before that moves through my veins, beats with each pump of blood in my heart.

Suddenly, I am OK.

“Wow,” Mom says after I’ve explained what has just happened to me. “Ride this, D. Ride it as long as you can. But, if you start to feel sad again, don’t get discouraged. Remember this moment and how you feel.”

I promise her I will, and then I drive back in to Las Vegas.

There’s a point when coming into the city I used to loathe: a spot on I-15 when the desert gives way to the resort-laden Las Vegas skyline.

Tonight, as I drive in against a thick black, starless sky, and the bright lights of hotels glimmering in the distance, I don’t feel anything but total elation.

This is my chance to make my life right. This is my chance to love where I am. To love who I am … and I DO.

For the first time in months, I fall asleep and sleep through the night. And, in the morning, I wake up feeling the same high as the day before. I am energized. I have a bounce in my step. I stand in the mirror, trying to think a negative thought about me. But, something happens. I can’t. I don’t cringe. I don’t see something ugly. I see a girl who has finally found her way, finally made those demons who sat on her shoulder whispering into her ear every insecurity in the world have nothing to whisper.

It’s as if a spell has been cast on me.

I am incapable of feeling bad for myself. I am incapable of hating myself. I look in the mirror and I smile … and it is genuine.

I. Am. Happy. Healed.

And, I know what needs to be done with my life.

When I met with the shaman, she had explained to me the need to put my desires out into the universe, to let the world know what I want.

So, on this gorgeous Sunday morning, glowing from the weekend, I put the following out:

I want to quit my job.

I want to travel.

I want to work with elephants.

And then, as if on cue, the universe takes notice.

About the Author

Diana Edelman is a travel writer and expat currently residing in Chiang Mai, Thailand. She is a former career breaker and long term solo traveler. Today, she helps promote responsible elephant tourism and is the co-founder of #RTTC, a weekly chat on Twitter focusing on responsible tourism. When she isn’t writing, Diana handles the PR and social media for Save Elephant Foundation, which runs the popular Elephant Nature Park. Her writing as appeared in About.com, Thought Catalog, The Huffington Post, Matador Network, Travel + Escape, Luna Luna, Vegas Seven, World Nomads, Viator, CheapOair, OneTravel and more.

40 Comments on " Hello, universe "

  1. Bret @ Green Global Travel May 7, 2012 at 4:15 pm · Reply

    Great post, D. I have been where you are (touched on it a little bit in my latest post), felt what you feel, and am SO excited for you to embark upon this next stage in your journey! To say that it gets better would be a dramatic understatement. So happy for you!

    • Diana May 8, 2012 at 12:13 am · Reply

      I’ve been reading along. Thank you! I am really excited to the next stage. It does get better, and I love it!!

  2. Sarah May 7, 2012 at 4:59 pm · Reply

    What! Ah! Where’s the rest? :)

    You uttered something I’ve been saying (jokingly, though it’s not) for the past few weeks. I’ve got #1 down. Now for the rest. Actually, maybe it’s time to think of how I put it out there to the universe first of all.

    I’m super thrilled by your post. How inspiring to hear how you felt after your time at Red Mountain! This is amazing! I don’t even know you, and feel incredibly happy for you! I’d love to learn more sometime about what you learned about yourself and how to tell the world what you want.

    Amazing times are ahead.

    • Diana May 8, 2012 at 12:13 am · Reply

      Thanks so much for taking the time to leave a comment! :) For me, I found that as soon as I had some positive energy, it was easy to just put out what I wanted. Plus, as a part of the shamanic session, I was given a rock. For 28 days, I was told to hold it in my hand, concentrate on this statement: “I give myself permission to fulfill my destiny.” Then, I was to blow on the rock. Did it work? I have to say this — in the span of two months, my life has changed dramatically. I have lived more the past two months, had more passion, had better energy, than I have ever had. There are days that suck, days where I feel challenged, but I don’t sit and stew anymore. I am really excited for the future! Hope you continue reading along — there is a lot more to come!

  3. Heathers Harmony May 7, 2012 at 10:08 pm · Reply

    I’m eating up every word of your greatest transformation yet! You go D!

    • Diana May 8, 2012 at 12:08 am · Reply

      Thank you, Heather!! It’s been a … ride. Mostly of which has been really, really exciting.

  4. Raymond @ Man On The Lam May 7, 2012 at 11:13 pm · Reply

    Quitters always win!! You go girl!! :)

    • Diana May 8, 2012 at 12:08 am · Reply

      Haha, thanks!! I concur.

  5. Pete May 7, 2012 at 11:16 pm · Reply

    I’m very happy for you D! To have that bounce, that energy, that positive emotion is something a lot of people don’t have. Grasp it. Embrace it. This is living :)

    • Diana May 8, 2012 at 12:07 am · Reply

      Thank you, Pete!! I love this comment. :)

  6. Gaelyn May 8, 2012 at 1:16 am · Reply

    Right on! You’ve found your way. This is SO exciting! I can hardly wait to hear what new plans unfold for you.

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:10 pm · Reply

      I’m really looking forward to the next chapter, too. As for all of the packing …

  7. Sophie May 8, 2012 at 3:29 am · Reply

    Sounds like a wonderful feeling!

  8. Bobbi Lee Hitchon May 8, 2012 at 3:45 am · Reply

    Yay!! Oh I can’t wait to read your happy adventures. I love how you decided from now on-I’m going to stay this happy. Some get caught up in low spirits and feel trapped. But it’s a long life and every moment is an opportunity to change or be lifted!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:09 pm · Reply

      Amen. You can choose to wallow, or overcome. :)

  9. Christine May 8, 2012 at 4:22 am · Reply

    So happy for you! Finding your purpose in life has to be an incredible feeling. Can’t wait to see what this new chapter brings you.

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:09 pm · Reply

      Thank you, Christine! I am really looking forward to the next chapter … in Thailand!

  10. Andi of My Beautiful Adventures May 8, 2012 at 7:35 am · Reply

    YES!!!!!!!!!!!!

  11. Ali May 8, 2012 at 8:15 am · Reply

    I’ve loved reading how you came to your decision to quit your job in favor of travel and of course, the elephants. So happy for you that you found a way to let go of the negative energy!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:06 pm · Reply

      Me, too!! It was not easy, but the struggles resulted in such a life-changing opportunity.

  12. Jade Johnston - OurOyster.com May 8, 2012 at 11:45 pm · Reply

    YAY!! I can’t wait for your newest adventures!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:04 pm · Reply

      Me, too, Jade!!

  13. Stephanie - The Travel Chica May 9, 2012 at 9:19 pm · Reply

    This is such an inspiring series of posts. I am very excited for you and to read about all the steps you are taking to change your life.

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:02 pm · Reply

      Thank you, Stephanie. I was a bit apprehensive about putting something like this out there since it doesn’t really involve travel exactly … but it is integral to getting to the next part of my story, which is traveling back to Thailand. I appreciate the support!! :)

  14. Jarmo May 10, 2012 at 12:36 pm · Reply

    Go D! Excited for you!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:01 pm · Reply

      Thank you!! I am excited, too!!

  15. Federico May 10, 2012 at 1:05 pm · Reply

    Live it up Diana, things are looking good!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 5:01 pm · Reply

      Thanks!! I definitely am!!

  16. Christy @ Technosyncratic May 10, 2012 at 5:26 pm · Reply

    Yay!!! Sometimes even just articulating what you want/need makes a world of difference, and allows you to move forward with a plan. :)

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 4:59 pm · Reply

      YES!!! It was a really exciting moment!

  17. Sebastian @ Off-The-Path.com May 10, 2012 at 10:59 pm · Reply

    I’m very happy for you D! Hope everything happens as you want it but as far as I know it is all going well. I hope we find some time to catch up here in Thailand! I’m going to be here until mid August!!!

    • Diana May 11, 2012 at 4:58 pm · Reply

      Thank you!! We HAVE to meet up. I have a horrible stop-over in BKK the night of July 12. Land at 11 p.m., leave at 6 something in the a.m. for Chiang Mai. But, let’s figure something out, please!!

  18. Jeremy Branham May 14, 2012 at 1:29 pm · Reply

    So happy to see that your dream is coming true! :)

    • Diana May 16, 2012 at 1:15 pm · Reply

      Thank you!! I am so very excited for this next chapter!!

  19. Erica May 15, 2012 at 11:19 am · Reply

    You can do it! :D

    • Diana May 16, 2012 at 1:14 pm · Reply

      You know it, babe!

  20. Christy May 16, 2012 at 5:07 pm · Reply

    I’m so excited for this new phase in your life and following along your new journey!

    • Diana May 17, 2012 at 8:46 am · Reply

      Thanks babe! I am looking forward to it!!

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